To the Blue ~ For OneShotWednesday~ June 15th, 2011

This piece was a sad piece to write.  It's meaning goes far deeper than words could express, and as usual, I have fallen back to the comfort of rhyme to attempt to express myself.  It's a habit that can be hard to break! :)  The photo is of my niece looking over the Bay of Fundy at Anthony's Park.  A beautiful picnic park located just beyond the historic village of Maitland, where grand sailing ships at one time were built, and pirate and ghost stories are the norm. 

I have been spending much time working on poetry for beyond my blog, and many of these require never before published works, so if I have overlooked returning a comment, please forgive me and know I'll be headed your way soon.

It seems momentum has picked up for me quite a bit, and it is with thanks to you, dear readers, poets and friends, that this has happened.  It is with a very grand and special thanks to the supportive, amazingly talented folks at One Stop Poetry, who have provided me inspiration on days when I swore none would be found, and for this weeks One Shot Wednesday I am presenting "To the Blue"


Ava
Natasha Head Photo


To the Blue

I wish I could have been there
The day you finally flew
The day they took your ashes
And tossed them to the blue.

I wish I could have been there
To have the chance to say
That though you may have doubted it
We loved you and your way.

I wish I could have been there
When your mind made you decide
That this life had been wasted
And it was time to say good~bye.

I wish I could have been there
To speak of our love for you
The day they took your ashes
And tossed them to the blue.

Comments

Louise said…
Oh, this is so sad...full of regret. I've a lot to learn about rhyme schemes, so it's great to come here and read yours...you do it so well. Thanks Natasha..
Brian Miller said…
it is sad...suicide itself is very heavy...i have seen many fall for its temptation...and the wish we could have been there in the after...
Pat Hatt said…
Nothing wrong with rhyme
I do it all the time
Whether for the funny bone
Or a more serious type of tone
Yes suicide itself is heavy as Brian sad
And can be a battle in ones head
Speaking from direct experience too
Can occur from out of the blue
Or can be a long sought out process you see coming
From a subtle humming
But after all the help and stuff you try
It is their terms if they want to die
Just when the snap comes from the pout
Make sure you are NO WHERE near about
Bubba said…
Some lost opportunities haunt us more than most. Elegantly expressed.
James Rainsford said…
Evocative, moving and skilfully written. Thanks for sharing Natasha. Kindest regards to you. James.
Anonymous said…
There's absolutely nothing wrong with using rhyme, and here the rhyme and the repeat make for the sadness in the poem hun. This must have been so difficult to write, for anyone who's ever lost a child, or seen one pass before their time, there's an added tangible sadness to the passing.

Eloquently written my friend x
Claudia said…
i think it's a long sad way someone goes before he decides on committing suicide, leaving friends and family just broken and probably heavy with guilt and the wish they had seen it come or had been there
The Silver Fox said…
Whatever varied goals you may have had when you sat down to write this one... You achieved them. Powerful, emotional, and all in all, outstanding!
Uneven Stephen said…
Succinct and sad, yet moving and full of love. Thank you for sharing such a personal piece.
Laura said…
you've touched my heart deeply with your poem Natasha...I hope that the process of writing was healing for yours.
mark said…
I admire those who can rhyme, and not sound silly but sublime...

The rhyming takes a touch of the sting out of the sadness of the poem, I think. Not much, just a touch.

Good write, Tash
brenda w said…
Sad, engaging write. A friend took his own life last November. It sticks around awhile. I wish I could have been there.
Joe Hesch said…
When I first "met" you, you were more a rhyming poet and I always enjoyed your verse. With this piece it seems you've taken the grit and depth of your non-rhyming work and given it a structured polish that makes it a complete gem. Wonderful work, Natasha.
hedgewitch said…
I agree with the above posters, the rhyme is well-used and appropriate here. Not many could express so cleanly the sorrow that holds no anger, only love, as you have in this wistful piece. Like LauraX, I hope writing it helped.
ayala said…
Sad and moving . Sorry .
Beachanny said…
Touching, emotional and well expressed. It has a completely angelic subtext. Beautiful. Gay
Sheila said…
this is maddening sad. I pray the writing, the remembering, the sharing, helps you to heal. I think that it might...
Henry Clemmons said…
Sad, sad, sad. But very well written. It bled it read so real. Such sincere and honest thoughts. I think we all have a few "I wish"s.
Great write. missed you.
Anonymous said…
Oh Natasha, so heartbreakingly sad & tragic, beautifully written, I don't want to say much more, as it is so personal, and painful...thank you for sharing...
Quirina said…
Sad tears for the blue ...
Percy said…
It is the wishes and the could of's that kill us. This is a beautiful piece Natasha
Unknown said…
This is beautiful.
Henry Clemmons said…
I know I told you I loved this already, but I wanted to get ur attention toward another piece I wrote. I experimented with recording it actually as a song. The recording is directly above the poem. I can't sing, but wanted to experiment, just to get an idea if I could do this or not and I can't get anybody to comment. Maybe it's bad. But I kinda like it. It's here.
http://henryclemmonspoet.blogspot.com/2011/06/just-man-recording-is-above.html

And thank you for the kind words on my civil war poem.
hyperCRYPTICal said…
This is beautiful despite its sad theme.

Anna :o]

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