The Poet ~ Rhyme Royal at dVersePoets
Today over at dVersePoets, Gay is treating us to a look at Rhyme Royal. This classic form of poetry has presented me a real challenge for some reason, but perhaps it is life in general that is posing the challenge as I struggle to perfect rhythm and rhyme. Me and perfection are kind of like oil and water, so I finally had to offer up what I've got, before I miss the session in it's entirety! So with a huge thank you to Gay and dVerse for the fantastic look at this form...I offer you my humble attempt. Trash it as you see fit!
The Poet
A poet came to visit me
With notebook and bleeding pen
Spellbound by the words he'd weave
I danced the line of sin
And would gladly dance again
Drunk on words and world as muse
Did wonders for this dying fuse.
On summer evenings fireside
We'd burn through histories
In conversations our hearts would hide
In plain sight for all to see
But I was waking me
And all at once I would admit
Without the words was life forfeit
A poet came to visit me
And because of him I write
With my own pen now flying free
The world's hardly such a fright
All shadows dropped from sight
The freedom at the hands of pen
I will not sacrifice again.
Are you up for the challenge of Rhyme Royal? Visit dVersePoets and try your hand. Gay is standing by to help!
Comments
i find this form intimidating as well...will try though...smiles.
^^^I always wanted to be a critic!
Actually, I like it very much, Natasha. Especially the last two lines of the first stanza.
David
HOLD IT! do not delete this post.
You have all the ingredients here.
this is a tough form and i think you injected some freedom. Your not shackled to it and remain expressive.
I was there with you peeking into the warm room full of inspiration and realisation.
Some cracking lines too.
The final defiant lines reverberate after reading.
Be obstinate and dont delete!
Be obstinate and dont delete!
A poet visited me once and said "Publish and be damned"...thanks to her i regularly partake in both ha ha.
Thanks for visiting me and your kind words
The struggle may have caused dismay
But came out just fine
Really liked the last line
As never sacrifice
At any price
Oh I see the form and I just smile
As I could go at it for a good long mile..haha
A poet came to visit me
And because of him I write
With my own pen now flying free
Yours is a lovely poem, Tash, and regardless of form, I like the rhythm and the near rhymes and esp. all the feelings it so victoriously flaunts. You go girl--and no one can say you didn't get a poem out of it all, even if the form may need another go round someday.
(Not a critic!)
Steve E
If a word I want to use as Heaven did in her first line is "garment" you have two choices. She began the line with this "Pale hued garment" which in itself is not an iamb but a trochee. But she could change it to "attire" if it works for her and that word is iambic OR she can change the word in front by deleting hued |Pale GAR|ment RESTS|with "rests after thereby creating two feet of iambic. Make sure you listen for the duh DUM as some say - the sound of a heartbeat.
I dissected hers in an email and she said she was going to post it with notes. I haven't had a chance to make it back. If you want me to take yours apart, I will, but not on your blog.
While we're waiting for the storm to pass though, here are the two articles I wrote for One Stop on this stuff (it seemed to have helped folks) especially @awdures [Shan] who went from zero to expert in no time. You may read her sonnet posted for today. It's not Rime Royal but it is perfect iambic tetrameter.
http://onestoppoetry.com/2011/04/one-stop-poetry-form-a-look-at-prosody.html
and
http://onestoppoetry.com/2011/04/one-stop-poetry-form-prosody-week-two.html
There's one on rhyme as well but that doesn't seem necessary for you right now. Let me know. You can send to the email you have for me.
It is a lovely poem as it stands - it just lacks meter to be properly called Rhyme Royal.
(You know I love your enthusiasm and I know you'll conquer all this stuff just because you can!)