Power Vs Force ~ OpenLinkNight (4) ~ dVersePoets

The state of the world weighs heavy on my mind today, and I remain forever grateful to the wonderful community of dVersePoets, where every week we can come and lay down our words, to share, to reflect, and perhaps find a little piece of mind in knowing we're not all that crazy. 

In this world of NOW, as the incompetency of our governments are pushed into the spotlight, the myth of civilized human beings seems to be just that...a myth. Rioting, feuding, looting...I believe we used to refer to it as raping, pillaging and plundering...is this what we have "evolved" to?  The only thing I know with certainty, is that I will probably never understand us, nor what makes us do the things we do.

And knowing this, makes my world of poetry, my version of escapism, all that much more needed. And I need all of you to know, just how important each and every one of you are.  We can change this world, and we can do it through understanding, compassion, respect for self and others, and through our poetry.  Instead of Revolution, let us think of Renaissance...and write till we can't write no more! Here's to you, Poets, Readers,Friends and let's raise our glass to another OpenLinkNight at dVersePoets...where one of my best friends and favorite writers will be holding down the fort.

Mr. Joe Hesch...this one's for you!

Power Vs. Force

Take what once was
and hold on tight
to its silver stream of memory.

I promise you, it will be no more.

Take what once was
existing in its wet vapor
as it fills your lungs, holds you weighted.

I promised you I would not stay here.

Take what once was
and see me there,
captured forever in the eye of your mind.

I told you long ago I was leaving.

Take what once was
in cradled hands
though you know your strength will crush it

Power versus force?
You sacrifice your power
when you chose to force my heart.

Within my spirit, resistance was born.

Now, what once was is no more
Your dictatorship has been revoked
A wise man once said
"absolute power, corrupts absolutely"
and my heart has been lost to the shrapnel.

Comments

Pat Hatt said…
Yeah it is so stupid how backward, brain dead some become
Being a looting rioting idiotic chum
Wonderful movement through the piece
From no more
To finally taking the detour
Yeah the governments crap is pathetic too
And that is way more than a single Face it Fact or two
Powerful!
Love:
"Within, my spirit, resistance was born."
Claudia said…
tash this is powerful - reminded me somehow of marie durand who was imprisoned for years in a tower because she was a believer and during this years she scratched one word into the tower walls - résister - resist...
Brian Miller said…
there is a sad song running through here...the leaving...havingtold them prior and maybe the message un received...you sacrificed your powere when you chose to force my heart...that is a heavy line...beautifully rendered though...
Anonymous said…
Nice reference to Lord Acton. You might be interested to know that Acton, a 19th century Catholic, was objecting to the dogma of Papal Infallibility at the First Vatican Council.

Here's to the power of poetry, which surely cannot be forced. Lovely poem, Natasha!

David
Scarlet said…
There is madness in the world indeed ~

I like these lines best:

Power versus force?
You sacrifice your power
when you chose to force my heart.
I sat back for a moment not being able to put my finger on it, then it hit me, I realized God was between the lines in your poem. Can you see that flicker of light? You hid it well...

I am reminded of a line in a movie a Bugs life...

"Those puny little ants outnumber us a hundred to one and if they ever figure that out there goes our way of life" -Bugs life

Creativity and inspiration changes the world.
steveroni said…
Would it not be grande if once-in-awhile we could simply stop and say, "You may be right"...?

Power nearly always corrupts. There are Peeps who are (almost always) trustworthy, kind, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean, and reverent.

Would that we each had found that one--grin!
Uneven Stephen said…
Powerful message, Natasha! You really deliver with the closer - hard-hitting and succinct. And I love "Power versus force? / You sacrifice your power / when you chose to force my heart." I can see this as a refrain to your musical poem. Thanks for the detailed intro - the incompetency of government is all I can think about lately as well.
Timoteo said…
Love it, because it operates on two levels--the personal and the universal.

(And still smiling at your comment!)
Unknown said…
This piece aches Natasha, to a tearful end. You have woven a haunting piece here that pulls at the heart. ~ Rose
Dulçe ♥ said…
Ah it so happens... so good we eventually can get rid of dictators... so many cannot.
Anonymous said…
Really strong, and reverberated so deeply with me Tash. Hauntingly poignant lady, you're getting good at touching those open wounds we all try to hide ;)
ayala said…
The state of the world weights heavily on my mind as well. I love what you did here.
Daydreamer said…
There is such a thin line between law and order and complete anarchy. We in the west have taught the last generation of children that it's ok to have what they want, when they want and, they no longer have to work for it and earn it. Now, we see the youth want what they want and they will get it all for free with riots and looting. You reap what you sow, I believe. We are loosing control through the do-gooders and politically correct folks who think a quick smack is bad for a child. Rubbish!
It's a scary world we live in these days and, it's not going to get any better because we've bred a whole generation of kids who have long lists of ready and waiting 'I wants' to be met.
I'm from Brighton, England an hour or so drive from London. My heart aches for all those affected by all of it.
Your prose is powerful in it's imagery of taking back control of your own life that you had given up.
The Poet said…
Powerful poem, Natasha.

Thanks for sharing.
Maude Lynn said…
Killer closing line! Love it!
~Kelvin S. M. said…
..i like the feel of this.. power that volumes deeper as what it calls.. and force that goes beyond what it should be.. a most influential piece indeed..
Mindy said…
Wow - powerful! Thanks for sharing - great job!
hedgewitch said…
Ah, Natasha. this one cuts to the bone--you lose your power when you force a heart--so true, and so sad that people do so. An excellent poem, full of all the dark knowledge that doesn't come (or go) easy.
Anonymous said…
there's something going on here that is totally 30,000 feet over my head. who are you really writing this to? sounds like a relationship you didn't like.
Anonymous said…
Came back for a second read! Loved it Natasha.
mrs mediocrity said…
love the close, the way you brought it all home in the end. it is a mad, mad world we live in...
Anonymous said…
Get insight into loss...
"You sacrifice your power
when you chose to force my heart."
Love those lines and full of truth! This poem is powerful, pointing to the pain of tyranny-- whether it is in a personal relationship or with a political body... read this several times, really enjoyed it.
Anonymous said…
these lines set up the ones everyone else are glowing about...i think they're more powerful:

"Take what once was
in cradled hands
though you know your strength will crush it"

I loved it. I think I'll read it again.

Lance
Anonymous said…
The conviction of those who know better. A nice reminder in these ridiculous times.
Anonymous said…
This is actually my reply to your comment but it works so well as a reply to your potent poem:
This is a profound statement and I am honored that you’ve shared it here. You speak of self possession and passion, the boundaries required to create and remain grounded, and the inner work that allows us to be brave enough to show our faces in the world. This is beautiful, you are beautiful, and I hope you continue your virtuous fight against doubt. Your participation in a supportive and engaging community of poets at dVerse is a wonderful gift you have given all of us.
Fireblossom said…
Rage more, Tash! ;-)
Beachanny said…
Feeling the heat and the torment all the way to Texas, Tash!
Henry Clemmons said…
I should not comment for not letting me on to the new place, but your words I have missed so much. I have to say well done. The world needs your voice, your passion, your art. In otherwords, I smell what your cooking and I like it!
Anonymous said…
Great lines in there, and of-course the inclination to negativity in the starting lines best describes your frustration.

"You sacrifice your power
when you chose to force my heart", loved this.
Powerful criticize of the riots
Unknown said…
the repetition - "Take what once was" - a growing force throughout the poem, empowering the speaker, and ends so well - "Now, what once was is no more..." - love the sounds. Thank you for sharing.
Anonymous said…
A very powerful piece. Thank you.
We are indeed living in sad, mad times. It seems so difficult to understand why or even if there is a why. I wonder what, if anything, we will learn from the last few days of madness?
Wow, this is some fantastic work here. I like the energy that crackles through this piece, very powerful indeed. I wish everyone could join in on this type of mindset but the fear of the human condition usually stops people from caring so much.

Wonderful words, thank you so much for sharing them with us!
Carys said…
Hi Natasha, I read this last night but wanted to mull it over before I commented. I wasn't sure at first if the repetition worked but now that I've read it again I can see that it does a very effective job of maintaining the momentum of the piece.

I think you have a couple of little problems. Firstly with this stanza

Power versus force? [I'd cut this line as you have it in the title]
You sacrifice your power
when you chose to force my heart.

You have a tense problem in the last two lines. It should be sacrificed.

More serious 'nit' with the last stanza

Now, what once was is no more [this line is a little clumsy - 'Now' is redundant and also it might work better written - What once was, is no more]
Your dictatorship has been revoked
A wise man once said
"absolute power, corrupts absolutely"
and my heart has been lost to the shrapnel.

I love the last line but there's no real correlation between that and the lines immediately above or the rest of the piece, no mention of guns or weaponry of any sort, which leaves that line (although good) out on a limb.

Not sure what to suggest at the moment, will think on it a bit more.

Other than that I think it's a really strong write.
Unknown said…
Utterly intense and direct, Natasha. You mince no words and use imagery to clarify intent. Nicely done.
Unknown said…
Tash, very aptly timed write. Quite honestly this has to be one of my favorite of yours, and that's a tough challenge, as I can't recall even a meh one. Absolutely love the way you put an idea forth than took it away, and carried that through- Again, really exceptional write:)
Arron Shilling said…
Hey Natasha,

Wow you have such amazing positivty - I can hear your up beat voice really pushing thru in your opening note.

Your clearly channeling all your power into writing great lines;-]

as u can tell(from my poetry) I have a fairly twisted outlook (not always), so any poem that ends with SHRAPNEL - i love!

Thanks for adding a bit of upbeat tempo to my day!
Victoria said…
This makes me think of how, when someone just "preaches" a truth, it doesn't work. But when someone teaches through a story (or poem) the point hits home. The way you used the repetitive lines to bring home the point you make is most effective, too.

And David, thanks for the "aside" about Lord Acton. Didn't realize that.
Luke Prater said…
I think your repetition serves you well here Tash. It underscores you content, empowers your theme.
Anonymous said…
"My heart lost to shrapnel" - what an image that creates. Good poem, Natasha.
Chasing Tao said…
Lots of depth and interweaving of thoughts...love the multidimensional aspect you have created Natasha...Cheers, Roger ☺
James Rainsford said…
Another complex and yet amazingly accessible piece Natasha. I loved it.
Seasideauthor said…
Tried to post yesterday but had a glitch. I have a visual problem with some of the code letters, you know that extra safety spam thingy. It happens all the time.

Great read and this seem to be a great observation of the world around us. Worldwide and interpersonal relationships.

Really liked the part about their power being revoked! Inspiring and oh so true.

As an aside: Is this a patterned form I would love to try one?
rmpWritings said…
powerful verse. the words just flowed beautifully (unforced).

"Within my spirit, resistance was born." I do love this line, that and the idea of "my heart has been lost to the shrapnel."
Unknown said…
I love your use of words here. Very powerful! This feels like something very personal to you but at the same time I can really relate to the feeling of it... I simply adoore the last line. Thanks for the read!
Randy Behavior said…
This is so true and personal to me. Thank you.
Joseph Hesch said…
Sorry for being so late to the fair, Natasha. Life got in the way of art and it's appreciation. I love it when you fold your angel wings and hang them on the shelf for a minute. Your smoldering heart flares and scorches a worthy target.

You threw a big net over a nasty world and drew it into a personal-size bag of dismay. Favorite lines: "You sacrifice your power / when you chose to force my heart."

On a personal note...you blush me, dear heart.

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