Dead Weight ~ OpenLinkNight

The voice, mechanical, going through the motions
at seven o'clock
on a cold Tuesday morning
in January.

There is no life there.
There is no hope.
No hint that perhaps
the soul that occupies the form
is awake.

She feels alone in her struggle.
Her resentment pours from her
washing over me in waves
as I approach the window.

Among the aromas of coffee
and toasted bagels, you can
taste the hate. As though she
is the only one ever to suffer

to struggle through this journey.
There is no please, there is no good morning
There is only her stare, glaring, cold

Her voice would be a hiss if she found it.
Perhaps she knows this
so she chooses to remain quiet

But as you drive away
the damage is done.
Drowned in the misery of another
like so much dead weight

like you don't have enough of your own misery
to lay to waste the body she inhabits...
were you to unleash it.

It's OpenLinkNight and we're Poetry in Motion! Joe Hesch is behind the bar, ready to pour your poison, and we are ready and waiting to receive your words.  Bring them to dVerse and get them heard. Pub opens 3pmEST and we're going all night long!

P.S. Sending all this love to the wonderful ladies at my favorite coffee shop. I offered them a course in smiling, but they've yet to take me up on it. ;)

Comments

Pat Hatt said…
Ahh Tuesday morning's in the cold, leave many no so bold. But it made for a verse for good old dVerse, at least they didn't curse, so could be worse. Maybe you should tell them a rhyme, as least they may smile for a time, thinking you are crazy and their eyes may not be so hazy.
Ginny Brannan said…
"...She feels alone in her struggle.
Her resentment pours from her"

There are several types of people this reminds me of: the "priveledged" teen with 'no clue,' has yet to work a full 40 hour week, and still thinks things should be just handed to her; the single parent with young children, worrying about day care, exhausted from working two jobs; the victim of the economy, worked decades for same company, now working for less than half of former income plus a few measly tips. Finally, that person who is just plain miserable all the time and likes to pass the attitude along. Sadly, all too common, there's plenty of those--this is the one I am reminded of the most in your write. An interesting observation, lots of food for thought!
The Silver Fox said…
Loved that. 'Nuff said.
Brian Miller said…
ugh...nice depth of feeling in this...cold, painful...i feel that this person is trapped honestly...and the weight of life as they have it is just too much...expectations are out the window...and they dont even feel it is seen...just my take...smiles...nicely done ma'am...
Scarlet said…
I don't like inhaling this....Be positive, I always say ~
Claudia said…
i agree with bri - she sounds trapped indeed... i think a course in smiling is much needed...maybe it just helps if you continue to pour some sunshine over her...i'm sure you are a wonderful sunshine thrower...smiles
ayala said…
Great write....she sounds trapped...I knew someone just like that and in the end she poisoned all the people that loved her.
Hot Rod Pics said…
(Gosh you people start this early!!) LOL Tashtoo, this is terrific, I *have* been thru that window, and you very adeptly took me there again, but to understand... (Thanks for a cool 'wake-up' post!)
Unknown said…
The idea of the hissing and the overall concept of dead weight came through really well. Great job Tash, thanks
mrs mediocrity said…
the no hope, that breaks my heart, then makes me wonder why, then i can forgive her, a little.
my first instinct is to pity her, trapped in misery, all through this i felt the cold, her cold heart. here's hoping that someday, she melts.
great poem.
CC Champagne said…
What a difference a smile would make... *smile*
Anonymous said…
Great poem! I feel like I experienced the trip to this coffee shop myself. I love the line: "As though she is the only one ever to suffer." How often do we forget that we are not alone in this challenge called life and everyone hurts sometimes. Peace, Linda
We often create our own misery--when we stew in it long enough it seems to slop over into other peoples' lives--Great write!

@AudreyHowitt
Mark Windham said…
ouch! Well said. A smile in the face of the ornery always wins the day.
Mark Butkus said…
Sounds like Chicago in winter. I feel your protagonist's pain.
Anonymous said…
Sorry for her, and sorry for the toxic spillage on others. Some lead lives of quiet desperation...others have to crap up their surroundings, people and things with their unhappiness. Emotional vampires. Sorry for it all. Well done, Tash!
Steve King said…
An unfortunate stasis: one who cannot keep what's in hidden, and one who does not let any of it out. This is a very dramatic scenario. The potential for many different futures overhangs it all. Stark and disquieting. All that make for a fine poem, Natasha.
Timoteo said…
Nicely done, Tash! So many people hate their jobs, but they're too afraid to step out into the unknown and leave. Sad.
I want to feel sorry for her and yet don't we all have to take responsibility for our feelings, our situation. Sometimes we don't realize how our moods and actions affect others...both in a bad way and a good way. Keep smiling and bringing them smiles. It will sink in eventually.
The Linnet said…
So terribly sad, so wonderfully written :)
This is very well written... I can see the scenario as it happens... feel so sad for this person, hope that there is a breakthrough.
Arron Shilling said…
a storm is brewing - under it all
- nice capture tash -
somehow on the edge of tragedy
we find a deeeper level to occupy
marousia said…
I feel with you - you captured the essence - I am commenting with google because Blogger won't let me use wordpress
iggyn8us said…
Im sorry they pissed you off. Lack of empathy through surges of apathy insults me too. You are my new customer service guru.

HaHa
Iggyn8us
Daydreamertoo said…
Some people hate their jobs so much, they resent being there and they are only there for the money but, you never can tell. She may have the weight of the world on those shoulders, too. But you are right, a smile costs nothing and, sometimes I deliberately smile at people to MAKE them smile back at me...LOL
Great piece. True too!
Unknown said…
There's so much pain here. You understand how ill-will and despair have a snowball effect. One gloomy mood starts a chain reaction whose end is never told here, but one understands how it will indeed breed itself into larger life. Your words have captured well the pestlential nature of the experience. All you who read, heed the warning and see how action engenders reaction, as the law of karma says.
Manicddaily said…
Ha! one problem with misery--a bit contagious! As you describe. k.
Anonymous said…
I want to empathize with the M.C, but, the smell coffee energizes me.
Lol, you put that line in the right place it re-energizes your senses to reread. great work
Patricia said…
I always wonder about those missing puzzle pieces, keeping me from seeing the whole picture. I can see her... you make me feel her pain/poison.
Among the aromas of coffee and toasted bagels, you can
taste the hate.

I see people like this all the time. They mystify me. I want to know whats eating them up- something horrendous- or is it something trivial.

Then again- ive been in jobs that i've hated- all you do is daydream of a better place- simple as that

this was really thought provoking and well observed
Unknown said…
I love the smoldering anger in this piece. Wonder whether that coffee wouldn't taste better served with a smile?!? Great write.
Semaphore said…
A measure of a writer is how they can create great poetry not just from earthshaking events, but from the simplest things, the thin trail of coffee steam, a brief look and glance that carry the weight of a life, a chance encounter that barely lasts a minute.
DAMN Tash.... I was right there with you all the way through the piece. Yeah, it sucks when your joy is replaced by the coldness projected off of someone else....
Bianca said…
This is a great poem! I think most of us have been there when someone else hasn't been having the best of times. I hope that if you are writing from experience that you both feel a bit better soon :)
Cathy Feaster said…
wow, Sasha, I know of people like that. A few minutes in their presence and my whole mood can change. I think a course in smiling is much needed for many.
Cathy Feaster said…
...and that's suppose to say Tasha, so sorry!
Dark Angel said…
Oh god, I so know that feeling! I absorb it like a sponge. I'd rather be a rock. Let their misery slide off like a passing slug's slime... yea that'd be nice.
Beachanny said…
Sometimes smiles and joy are not as contagious as frowns and misery. God only knows what demons possess her. After reading Brandon's poem today, I wonder what shields those damaged people who don't take to drink and drugs. What horror has shaken them so that they have to greet a hopeless day after day with less. Do they keep on going, do they snap, do they grimly make your day worse. I don't know. I know your joy is palpable. So if they can't smile for you (or she can't)then just say a prayer for her to find peace. The poem wonderfully portrays your pity and frustration. Well done.
Cad said…
Yep - a smile will always start the day in a happy way, but many folks have yet to learn this universal fact... :) Keep up the good work in spreading the message...
Trapped in a painful place is like suffocating in sadness... very vivid.
James Rainsford said…
Raw and biting. Like a chill wind of disenchantment. Powerful and authentic Natasha. Loved its hard edged despair.
Anonymous said…
This is my favorite:

"Her voice would be a hiss if she found it.
Perhaps she knows this
so she chooses to remain quiet"

http://rosemarymint.wordpress.com/2012/01/31/the-studio/
Unknown said…
I like how this brings forward the impact our energies, even when brief. Wonderful write! ~ Rose
painful, a bit cold but I kinda know the feeling ... a brilliant write.
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