Hours in the Day

There are not enough hours in the day
For me to please everybody.
If I could double them
It would not change the exhaustion that comes
With pleasing yourself last.
The silent treatments
The inconsiderate actions
Being forgotten...so very easily.
How do you treat another in such a fashion?
How do you have seemingly endless conversation
All laid to waste when you realize
They were only pretending to be listening,
Waiting for the next best thing?

I have hopes & ambitions
Dreams I hope to realize
In helping others
I thought there would be help for me.
I mistook loneliness for friendship
Selfishness for caring.

I am running out the clock
On this once in a lifetime chance at freedom.
My dreams can not be scheduled
Nor can I be held responsible
For carrying on the dreams of another.

It is not defeat I am admitting
Simply the realization
The only one I have to please is myself.
It is only me who keeps me awake into the wee hours of the morning.
It is my own heart that feels the weight I choose to burden myself with.
It is only my dreams I can nurture.
Only myself, I can fix.

Fixing...takes time


NH



Comments

aka_andrea said…
this is kind of my life too right now, I gave up so much of me for so long that I found myself in a place where I just had no idea who I was anymore...it has taken a long time to learn to just be ok with doing what I want, what I love and to begin considering what my dreams are~

every line in this speaks to realizations that are hard to face but these,
"It is only me who keeps me awake into the wee hours of the morning.

It is my own heart that feels the weight I choose to burden myself with."

sort of screamed at me,

good luck on your journey Poet, write hard~
Diana Lee said…
So many could relate to this, i'm sure, but for me...it took me by the throat, held me up to a mirror and said, look and listen. Thanks for writing.
I really like the voice of this one. IT is very vulnerable and human and approachable. Yes, it's your one life so don't waste it. Loved this, Mosk
The Silver Fox said…
Great thoughts! Always a pleasure to come here and partake of your offerings.
Ben Ditty said…
Always powerful. You inspire me, Tash.
Susie Clevenger said…
I understand and relate. Jumping into the pool of others often drowns our dreams.

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