I Wanted To...

I would have been there, had my life been my own. But I'm not just living for me, you see. There are other lives, intertwined. Other hearts and other hopes. These things matter. As much as you would have me believe I matter more, I know better. So do you.

I would have been there, had your actions equaled your words. But your character betrayed you. The thin film you call integrity was no match for broken promises and selfishness. I've lived through all that once, and since we've already established how much I matter, you'll understand the importance character and integrity play in this life I'm attempting to live fully.

I wanted to want to go, but reason would not allow it. All signs pointed to staying as survival and leaving as demise.

As I watch you cry "victim" from a distance, crafting a tale to win pity, I realize I am capable of saving myself after all...and for that...

I wanted to say, "Thank you."