Coddled
Sticking with attempted forms, I thought I'd give a go at an Italian Sonnet. Not much of a "student" and always a rule breaker...sorry Mom & Dad, I have to admit I've been enjoying the Form Monday's at Onestop Poetry, as my understanding and poetic vocabulary grows. So, while I'll never have any claim to fame for being a true to form kind of girl...at least you won't be able to say I didn't try. For this weeks OneShotWedneday I give to you, for your reading and reviewing pleasure......
Coddled
In evening over fields of gold I fly
As burning sun dips so below to rest
And comforted against my mother's breast
Encouraged wings, so once again I try
Amongst clouds in the ghost gray evening sky
Upon current of gentle wind I crest
Courage found to take and pass this life test
As I embrace the realm where ghosts reside
Lost amongst graveyard mounds and weeping sounds
Native spirits causes my heart to beat
Where fear and loathing amongst shadows hide
But Mother sends the enemy to the ground
And again I take credit for their defeat
~Natasha Head~
Mary Cassatt
Comments
But that would be a lie.
But is can still be said
Aren't I twisting your words in my head
Plus I am number one
To tell you another job well done
Take that Brian and Waystationone
I beat you by a ton
You beat the scary ghosts of the night
Oh you must have put up a good fight
Imagine if they were real
That would be quite the ordeal
While I was typing my rhyme
Don't you have a life
Instead of causing me all this strife..haha
sonnets are written usually in strict iambic meter -so if you are very serious about it, you could work on some parts. but it is a really beautiful piece and i like the message very much - and together with the image - yes - beautiful
Very lovely poem --well done!
xo